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feeling uncomfortable

I was waiting on the 728 bus at Union Station (stop 7) this morning when this man walked over and stood right next to me.

He was laughing loudly and saying something as he made his way over (I didn’t catch what he said). He commented that the sun felt good, and then immediately asked if I watched adult films.

I firmly said No, feeling uncomfortable with the abrupt and sexual question, and then he said, “I know you do.” He continued to laugh loudly and tell me, “Even the most innocent and sweet sisters can get low down…”

I started to walk away as he commented on how sexy my boots were and how pretty of a gal I was, while looking at me and laughing loudly. He taunted me and laughed as I walked off, I started to block it out.

I took his picture, and a minute later he walked past me to get on his 733 bus. He purposely walked close to me and said casually, though sounding hostile for being rejected, “It’s okay, I don’t want you anyway.”
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I don’t feel comfortable running on the beach anymore

While I was running along the beach, a guy in a hoodie on an orange bike came riding right towards me in the sand.

As he grew closer I started to think he might run into me. He rode right next to me and spat on my face!

I instinctively yelled out “F*** You!”

He just zoomed past and continued down the beach. I wiped off the spit and started to run again toward the nearby Beach Patrol building. While running, I had this feeling I should turn around. I stopped and looked behind me and the guy on the bike had made a U turn and was coming back my way, presumably to spit on the back of my head!

I just stood there with my hands on my hips. He continued towards me and then suddenly turned around and speed off towards the Marina. I turned around and continued towards the Beach Patrol, found an officer and reported it.

That was a couple days ago and I can’t stop thinking about it.

It’s really getting to me, much more than I thought it would. I don’t feel comfortable running on the beach anymore, which is very upsetting as I have enjoyed running there for many years now.

I feel vulnerable, angered, and defeated.

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“Alex is a nice name for a girl”

I work at In-N-Out Burger, and two days ago I was working in the dining room during my shift, cleaning off tables and sweeping the floor. There were two middle-aged men eating at a table next to one I was cleaning, and one of the men said to me “Alex is a nice name for a girl. I like a girl named Alex.”

He was grinning and looking up and down my body in a way that made me feel very uncomfortable, even though I was wearing my work uniform, a collared shirt that isn’t form-fitting at all, and baggy pants. I am a 21 year old female who doesn’t identify in the traditional gender binary, so sexist actions always annoy me because they assume so much about people!

In the past, I’ve had a hard time standing up to harassment, because I was taught to “be nice” or “just ignore it.” I’m typically a very friendly person at work, smiling and making conversation with customers, but I’ve also been challenging myself to be a bolder person latley and not take sh*t from anyone.

So I stood up tall, looked him in the eye, and said in a strong voice, “Thanks, I like my name because it’s gender neutral.” (I had a little fun with it and used a deeper voice than usual!)

I felt safer than I would on the street, because I was at work and in my uniform, and it was a busy place. But it still felt good to communicate to him in some way that his assumptions about me were wrong, his words had no power over me, and that his attitude of entitlement was misplaced.

I think that if anything, my reply startled him a little, but maybe it also will make him re-think his actions and behave differently in the future.

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To this day I am afraid to take the bus alone.

I was about 13 years old wearing a childish shirt/skirt combo.

I had to take 2 busses to get home and while I was waiting for the second bus (with no one else around) to come, a van drove past me on my side of the street, slowed down, and a man stared at me as he rolled past.

The van went to the next turn and made a U turn then parked on the street across from me, staring. I walked a little down the street, and the van crept forward!

I ran into the nearest gas station crying and an older women stayed with me until my bus arrived. She told me that I “looked young” and the man in the van probably had intentions of abducting me. Is it my fault I looked young? I was 13 after all!

To this day I am afraid to take the bus alone.

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Creepy eye contact

I was walking home and a man in his late 20s pulled over and made eye contact with me (after very slowly and deliberately checking me out) and commented on my legs.

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Don’t talk to women that way!

Man walking by: “sexy”
Me: “Fuck you! Don’t talk to me! Don’t talk to women that way! Etc”
Him: “fuck you! Etc”
Security guard, witnessing: “this is LA, how sad you need to respond. Ignore it.”
Me: ” I will respond however I feel like it. Maybe I’m sick and tired of this shit, and the millionth person who talks to me is the last fucking straw. And fuck you too! ”
ETC.

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He called to me, “Damn, can I call you some time?”

I was biking to work when a man in a reflector vest (I assume a city worker) called out to me, “Hi, how are you doing?”

I was actively biking, so I only nodded in his direction.

As I biked away, he called to me, “Damn, can I call you some time?”

Made all the more delightful by the fact that my taxes pay for his salary.

So I just paid to be harassed. Wonderful.

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Chased!

Chased in a car! At 5am.

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